I am awfully tired of others telling me how I should live my life. It is my decision to whom I date, where I go, what I eat, what I wear, and what I do with my life. I am a force to be reckoned with, and I'm getting awfully, awfully, sick of being ignored. Most importantly, sick of my choices being thrown in my face, and having my choices belittled because you don't think I know what's best for me.
Constantly pointing out flaws every time there's a problem, and always telling me how much better things could be if I just walk away. Why is it so strange for people to think that I just MIGHT know what's good for me? Why is it that people think they know what's best, when they haven't lived my life? They're not inside my head. They don't know my heart. It's so frustrating, and extremely difficult to keep the peace, and the conflict out of my life! I really wish everyone would get along, but that doesn't look like it's going to happen.
It's time to write some new rules for my life, and to stand by them.
You can't respect me, you can't respect my choices, you can't give me room to make my own mistakes, you can't allow me to make my own decisions, then you can just fuck off.
I didn't get this far just to get bullied by some know it all who has such a miserable existence that they have to constantly poke and prod into my life.
In other news, I'm having trouble in my relationship. We haven't had relations in what seems like forever, and every time I try to talk to him, he becomes defensive. Earlier today, I told him, "I'm running low on groceries." He said, "What do you want me to do about it?"
Since he was being such a dick, I said, "Nothing. Don't even worry about it."
He said, "Seriously. There's nothing I can do!!"
I replied, "It isn't like I wanted to have a discussion, or to put our heads together and brainstorm."
He tried to re open negotiations, but I wouldn't have anything to do with it; he stormed off with an angry, "fine" thrown over his cold shoulder. He went to bed, and I started to de-frag my computer while I'm watching Scrubs. Which, I've seen every episode at least six times. I love this show. ^_^
Whether it's a relationship, or a friendship, constant interactions with people will always take work. There will always be conflict, and they won't always get along. This is a fact I have to come to terms with....only when my friendship, and my relationship come to terms with each other. When the insults, the degrading names, and the sarcastic side comments from both parties stop, I might be less of a bitch.
But until then? They're just going to have to deal, because I don't have any patience left. None. Nada. Zip. Zilch.
I'd rather immerse myself inside of a game where I can talk to people online, and we discuss raiding strategies. Books, video games, and pretty much anything in the geek world is always easier than dealing with people.
I hate this so much. I hate having to write about this stuff, and I've put it off for as long as possible, which is why I haven't written anything in a long time - I'm trying so hard not to hurt anyone's feelings or step on anyone's toes, because I'm just. that. fucking. nice.
No more Miss Nice Girl. Grow up, and deal with it - I've made my choice. What is yours gonna be?